Thursday - October 10, 2024

Dr. Pat Saxon

READING


“People don’t feel like they have the right to grieve. . . . A year into this [pandemic], the losses are piling up. I just had this conversation in my office when this person said, ‘I can’t complain about my grief, because people have it worse.’ But we have to correct that thinking. Your grief is your grief. You can’t compare it to other people’s.” Lisa S. Zoll, LCSW


WORDS OF HOPE


I have long been concerned about “unattended sorrow” as Steven Levine calls it—grief, that for a variety of reasons, goes underground, gets buried. And lately, especially since the pandemic, I have come to believe that all of us are carrying unhealed grief. Our losses—actual deaths, as well as the loss of safety and security, health, bodily autonomy, and family connections from political rancor, to name a few-- have been wide and deep. We are such a death-averse culture, and the pain of mourning is intense—so we’re sitting on it—and in it.


This morning, I hope that sharing some information on disenfranchised grief will be helpful.


In his book Disenfranchised Grief: Recognizing Hidden Sorrow, Kenneth Doka defines this type of grief as a loss that is not “socially sanctioned, openly acknowledged, or publicly mourned.” Its major categories are unrecognized relationships, losses that are considered “less significant” than others, losses surrounded by stigma, losses excluded from mourning, and ways of dealing with grief that don’t align with social norms. These categories cover a huge array of losses—from miscarriage, the death of a pet, the death of siblings or an incarcerated friend or relative, the death of a teacher or student, grief felt by a transgender person for a murdered black trans activist even if not personally known, death in an LGBTQ+ relationship not validated by family—even the loss of a best friend of many years. *


So often when we encounter a grieving person, we don’t know what to say. But if we can listen empathetically and respectfully to honor what the loss has meant to them, even one person can be an instrument for healing. Personal or group rituals can bring sorrow into the light as well. A church friend lost two aunts during the pandemic to Covid but was not able to have the memorial service. Just recently though a family member called together those who could come in an informal gathering where memories were shared and the aunts were lifted up. That simple commitment and ritual helped move the family’s grief to a new and healthier place.


Though this devotion has just introduced a large subject, I hope that it does raise the awareness that speaking our sorrows to one with a compassionate heart can be healing.


PRAYER


Loving God, the Psalmist tells us that you note our sorrows, keeping our tears in a bottle, and draw near to the broken-hearted. Help us be your compassionate hearts here on earth and companion the grieving. Amen.


DEVOTION AUTHOR


Dr. Pat Saxon


*One article expanding on the topic. https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/disenfranchised-grief#examples


Need More Inspiration? Read our Daily Devotions

By Jonathon McClellan February 2, 2026
SCRIPTURE Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.  READING Rev, Dr.Martin Luther King Jr. As you press on for justice, be sure to move with dignity and discipline, using only the weapon of love. WORDS OF HOPE A Cause Worth Fighting For Today, on this first day of Black History Month, we find ourselves in an argument as old as civilization itself. This argument has been repeating itself, beginning again in every generation, every nation, every city, and in every home. But this argument isn’t happening between two opposing parties. In truth, it is rare for anyone to be as good as they appear or as wicked during a war. People tend to live according to the passions of their convictions, and in doing so, tend to feel justified. And bludgeoning someone with one’s convictions becomes a never-ending cycle–escalating over time, demanding greater costs and greater sacrifices. However, true justice has always been hard won, has always needed to be defended, and has always yielded itself to morality. We need not merely the appearance of the moral high ground, but rather the examination of what exactly the moral high ground is. When faced with a seemingly insurmountable climb, Martin Luther King Jr.’s biggest obstacle was not the opposition, however, but his own heart, and how many times must a man who was publicly shamed, shackled, beaten and berated every time he left his house… How many times must he have been tempted to give in to his wrath? How would he have been able to successfully lead a movement using only the weapon of love if he had? At the end of the day, we won the argument because we won the battle over the heart; and if we need to ask ourselves what love is or what goodness looks like, then remember that Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. was modeling himself after Christ. PRAYER Merciful Creator, though we are tempted to give into wrath, it is because of our sadness and despair that makes the temptation the most terrible battle for us all. But You are greater than our circumstances and Your salvation must certainly come. Fill our hearts with Your love like a healing balm and deliver us from temptation. Bless you, God, Amen DEVOTION AUTHOR Jonathon McClellan Order fo St. Francis and St. Clare
By Donald (Luke) Day January 30, 2026
SCRIPTURE John 15:15 I have called you my friends, because I've made known to you everything that I've heard from my Abba God. WORDS OF HOPE An ongoing question for early Christian leaders revolved around the influence that Jesus the Christ had on their belief in one God. Three descriptive actions came to mind. Jesus was Revealer of God, Redeemer of humankind, and their Lord. From the beginning, he became famous among the villagers for his wise and holy words which told of God's love, forgiveness, and divine welcome, as well as for words of correction and encouragement. By these words and the way he related to others, Jesus revealed much about his Abba God. Jesus revealed God's loving nature as he encountered everyone - rich or poor, powerful or outcast. He revealed God's patience and understanding of human frailty as he gently led and taught his disciples. Jesus revealed God's offer that all could enter the Kingdom of God and live under divine sovereignty. He revealed the tender, healing care of God as he reached out to heal all manner of illness. Before Jesus walked among us and called us his friends, it seemed that God was very distant from the common person, but now the Divine's presence seemed to walk with them, talk to them, and eat meals with them. Jesus' life offered the opportunity to have an intimate relationship with God. Now with the revelation of Jesus, all those who sought a true relationship with God could find divine presence in their daily life. These are several aspects of the Holy One which Jesus revealed to his followers, but his divine influence was certainly not confined to those he called his friends in the first century. That presence is still flourishing in us today. How about you? What other characteristics of God are revealed to you through the life and ministry of Jesus? PRAYER Loving Creator, as we encounter the rich, the poor, the powerful or the outcast in our own lives, may we show them your patience and understanding revealed through the tender healing care of Jesus. DEVOTION AUTHOR Donald (Luke) Day Order of St. Francis and St. Clare
By Rev. Dr. Neil G. Thomas January 30, 2026
SCRIPTURE 1 Timothy 5:17-24 New International Version The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. For Scripture says, “Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain,” and “The worker deserves his wages.” Do not entertain an accusation against an elder unless it is brought by two or three witnesses. But those elders who are sinning, you are to reprove before everyone, so that the others may take warning. I charge you, in the sight of God and Christ Jesus and the elect angels, to keep these instructions without partiality, and to do nothing out of favoritism. Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, and do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure. Stop drinking only water and use a little wine because of your stomach and your frequent illnesses. The sins of some are obvious, reaching the place of judgment ahead of them; the sins of others trail behind them. WORDS OF HOPE Honoring the Work, Finding the Joy In today’s reading, Paul offers practical wisdom for life together in community. He speaks about honoring leaders who work diligently, holding one another accountable with fairness, and living with integrity that does not hide behind appearances. At first glance, this passage may feel heavy, concerned with discipline, responsibility, and seriousness. Yet beneath it all is a profound respect for work done well and lives lived honestly. Paul understands something important: how we treat work, and the people who do it, matters deeply to God. On this Fun at Work Day, we are reminded that joy and responsibility are not opposites. The call to honor faithful labor does not mean work must be joyless or burdensome. Instead, when work is rooted in purpose, respect, and shared commitment, it becomes life-giving. Fun, laughter, and connection are not distractions from meaningful work; they are often signs that the work is healthy. Paul cautions against rushing to judgment and against ignoring harmful behavior. Integrity, he reminds us, eventually reveals itself, both the good and the bad. This is true in our workplaces, our ministries, and our daily lives. When we act with care, fairness, and humility, our work reflects God’s justice. When we allow joy to exist alongside accountability, our work reflects God’s abundance. Today, as we celebrate fun at work, we can pause to give thanks: • For colleagues who labor with integrity. • For those who serve faithfully, often unseen. • For moments of laughter that strengthen community. • For the reminder that God is present not only in solemn responsibility, but also in shared joy. May we honor one another’s work, practice fairness and grace, and allow joy to remind us why our labor matters. In doing so, we bear witness to a God who delights not only in what we do, but in who we are together. PRAYER God of purpose and joy, bless the work of our hands and the people with whom we labor. Teach us to honor one another, to act with integrity, and to find joy even in responsibility. May our work reflect your justice, and our joy reflect your love. Amen. DEVOTION AUTHOR Rev. Dr. Neil G. Thomas Senior Pastor Cathedral of Hope United Church of Christ
By Dr. Pat Saxon January 29, 2026
SCRIPTURE John 15:12 This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. “Love requires sacrifice because it demands something from us that selfishness refuses to give. The more we love like Jesus, the more it will cost us. But the more it costs, the more it transforms.” --post from Wholy Christian WORDS OF HOPE On this wintry morning, I could easily have rolled over and gone back to sleep. But Sage’s soft whine pierces my foggy mind, and I know that the steroids she’s on to heal the hematoma on her ear can lead to accidents in the house if she’s not let out soon enough. So I roll out, give her kisses and a morning treat, and let her out the back door. Then it’s time to feed her, armor myself against the cold, fill her treat bag, put on her “vest” (harness) and get her lead. I smile broadly as she skitters down the steps in her soft aqua and lavender sweater spashed with snow flakes and hearts and an oval of Anna and Elsa from Frozen in a sisterly embrace centered on her back. It was one of the many gifts the women at the Marshall Animal shelter showered upon us on the day of her adoption, February 15th, 2025. When this sweet dog with the pensive eyes came into my life nearly a year ago, I knew that she had been picked up off the streets, had been in the shelter for over a year, that she was recovering from knee surgery, and that her wonderful foster mother had begun the rehab. But the surgeon directed that two to three walks a day were imperative for full recovery and that I needed to continue that regimen for months. What I didn’t know was that Sage would require more care than I had imagined—a good bit of medication, the care of our regular vet, and an ongoing relationship with an integrative veterinary specialist to assess her mobility issues and plan a therapeutic program which includes twice a month laser treatments. Was I ready to be a dog mom to a special needs dog? Not really, but love would not allow me to return her to the shelter. When a dog has been in a shelter for as long as Sage, it requires a long period of adjustment, patience, trust-building, and learning who she is—and not who you imagined your ideal dog would be. Early on Sage showed herself to be sweet, delighting in the world of smells, and friendly with other people and dogs. Walking with her through the neighborhood she would practice what someone calls the “Sage flop”—just suddenly lying down in someone’s yard when she reached the limit of pain or tiredness in her legs (and/or was stalling getting back home!) Neighbor after neighbor has “granted” her yard privileges. Watching the weather report is a regular activity now—looking to get advance notice of storms because she is terribly thunder-phobic, quaking in fear and hiding in close places until her medication takes hold. Such fear tears at my heart, so I put on Native American flute music and sit with her, stroking her fur until she begins to calm down. The call to love—whether a child, a partner, friend, or animal companion—sets a claim upon our lives. Once we have said yes, we’re called out of ourselves to offer all the time and money and care we can give. It’s costly, this sacrificial loving as Jesus loved. But for many of us, once on the path, there’s no going back. PRAYER Holy God, Keep leading me on the path of Love. Amen. DEVOTION AUTHOR  Dr. Pat Saxon
By Dan Peeler January 28, 2026
SCRIPTURE  Galatians 6.9 “Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” WORDS OF HOPE Today is Rubber Ducky Day, which may seem to you like just another of those random daily holidays that we observe to entertain ourselves. To me, it has a multitude of definitions and the most important one is reflected in today’s Scripture reading about the rewards of hard work. I have a long-time friend at this church who has one of the most impressive collections of rubber duckies on the planet, bath toys of every shape and size imaginable. They are just one of the ways she and her wife spread joy- and spreading joy is not an easy job these days, but they do not grow weary in doing good; they do not give up! The duckies also remind me of another acquaintance from many years ago, the incredible puppeteer and producer, Jim Henson. I met grew to know at several Puppeteer Conventions. We shared the love of doing good things for children. Jim made the Rubber Duckies famous through the classic Sesame Street song, “Rubber Ducky, You’re the One” sung by Jim’s Muppet, Ernie. Jim, too, through all the enormous challenges of TV and Movie production, never gave up, always worked for the good, and left an incredible harvest to the whole world. After Jim Henson was gone, the roll of Ernie (of Bert and Ernie) went to several other puppeteers throughout the years. One of them, a brilliant performer named Billy, is a long- time friend as well. I met him when he was 20 about 20 years ago and immediately found out that working for the Muppets was his lifetime dream. He worked for years perfecting the voices and classic moves of several of the characters, all the while saying that he knew the odds of getting an audition were probably 100,000 to one, but he would not give up. I knew that he probably was being conservative about those odds, but Charlie, my business partner, and I would not let the odds hold back our constant encouragement to our friend. And, thanks be to God, in due season, Billy got the job. Billy was now Ernie. After 8 years with Sesame Street, he moved on to other adventures, but he left them with an iconic treasure: the original Henson Rubber Ducky! So, whether you are a tireless church worker, a potential world-famous mogul of an entertainment empire, or a kid with a dream, carry that verse from Galatians with you always. “Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” And don’t forget to hug a rubber ducky today, if one happens to cross your path. PRAYER God of Love and realized dreams, may we never give up, never tire of doing good, knowing the act itself never stops blessing the receiver and giver alike. Amen DEVOTION AUTHOR Dan Peeler Order of St. Francis and St. Clare
By Kris Baker January 27, 2026
SCRIPTURE  Philippians 2:12-13 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. - WORDS OF HOPE A few weeks ago, we commemorated the baptism of Jesus in the Jordan River by John the Baptist. Baptism is a pivotal moment in the life of a Christian. It is the moment when we are marked as Christ’s own, take up his armor, and become a minister of Christ’s gospel. Some big promises are made when we are baptized. We promise to renounce the evil forces in the world, affirm faith in the trinity lived out through the church, and to live a life rooted in the teachings of Christ. Just as Jesus’s baptism, at around age 30, marked the beginning of his public ministry “and a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17), so too is it the beginning of our journey with Christ. If we truly live to fulfill our baptismal promises, there is much fear and trembling along the way. Following Christ is not easy and it’s not always comforting. We can find comfort in the unconditional love of God given to us through Christ, but as baptized Christians, we are called to also share and grow that love. Sharing God’s love means standing up to evil, fighting for justice, proactively caring for the marginalized, protecting God’s creation and all that inhabit it, and proclaiming the good news of Christ in all things. Taking on these responsibilities is unsettling and scary. Taking on these things can be uncomfortable. Being a Christ-follower does cause fear and trembling. But as we say when we are baptized, I will do these things that are required of me with God’s help. What we need to remember is that God is always near to help us, but we need to be willing to do the work. Much of that necessary work is done inwardly. A daily discipline of prayer and study roots us in Christ. Another helpful practice is a Daily Examination of Conscience, a time to reflect on our relationship with the Holy each and every day. There are many ways to do a daily self-examen. I have used this simple form for many years. At the end of each day, I reflect and journal on these three questions: What have I done today for God?, What have I done today with God?, and What have I done today to God? From this practice comes joy and gratitude, but it also sheds light on the places where I need to both offer and ask for forgiveness for my shortcomings. With that, I am equipped to meet the next day, listening to and working with the God who is working in and through me in order to fulfill God’s good purpose. The act of getting baptized is short and merely a beginning to the much longer and more challenging lifelong challenge of being baptized. We have the opportunity throughout the liturgical year to renew our baptismal vows. We can also revisit them ourselves anytime we are struggling with God’s call to us and our response. PRAYER Loving God, today I remember the promises I made in baptism. Wash over me again with your grace, cleanse my heart, and kindle the joy within me that comes from loving and serving you. Amen. DEVOTION AUTHOR Kris Baker Order of Saint Francis and Saint Clare
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